toxic self-talk diary

Have you thought about, when was the last time you gave yourself nurturing feedback?

I’ve been pondering a lot about being your own cheerleader and how that can affect everything you do.

We seek for healthy and balanced relationships with others, instead of toxic, twisted ones.

But the more I reflect upon my own self-talk I’ve realized how easily it is toxic and twisted with heavy demands that have no joy.

What exactly is it that I am demanding of myself?

A perfectly managed life in every area.

And take into account that it’s part of my personality that I always have some area of my life out of control and it is okay. 

So as a roadmap I have this list of rigid lifeless NO’s and MUST’s, with no celebration of the life that’s actually happening around me.

A perfectionist approach that kills all the joy before I even start doing anything.

Yes, I am a recovering perfectionist, so this shouldn’t surprise me.

But the way that automated self-talk is playing in my mind is so toxic, that I would never allow it as something that’s okay in my relationships with others.

And yet I am blindly obeying it, going through my lists of demanded perfection.

How does it look like for you to intentionally build a relationship with yourself, that allows you to enjoy your life as it is, today?

What lists of perfection do you throw into the trash bin when your mind creates drama and offers you the toxic list?

What is the simple thought that you commit to carrying that allows you to see the beauty in your life today, as it is?

Yes, you can build your life piece by piece, further from here, guided by pure joy.

But you find your way into that spot only through thankfulness of what already is.

Name one thing you’re thankful for today, just as it is.

And that’s where you start.

Real and raw joy is your guide along the way. 

I’ve learned a secret that toxic perfectionism and that bubbly joy are opposite powers.

Love,

Pia